The most wanted white elephant gifts

Archie McPhee Yodeling Pickle

Wanted for Yodeling. It's a pickle. It yodels. That's the entire case.

Press the button and a plastic pickle yodels at you. It serves no purpose at all, which is why it gets fought over at gift exchanges and lives on someone's desk for years.

Why it's here Press it the moment it's unwrapped. Then watch the room decide they need it.

Let it slide if The recipient shares a small office with anyone who values silence.

Squatty Potty Toilet Stool

Wanted for Being funny at the party and useful on Monday.

The famous bathroom stool everyone jokes about and then quietly uses. It's the rare gag gift that does what it says, so it tends to get kept rather than regifted.

Why it's here The room will laugh when it's opened, and someone will steal it for 'a friend.'

Let it slide if Your gift exchange skews formal or includes your boss.

Cat Butt Tissue Dispenser

Wanted for Exactly what it sounds like, and it's still on the loose.

A ceramic cat whose tissues come out exactly where you're afraid they do. It's a white elephant classic and a guaranteed conversation piece for the cat lover with a good sense of humor.

Why it's here It's a great pick for a crowd of friends. Just maybe think twice for the company party.

Let it slide if They'd be mortified to have this out when guests are over.

Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer

Wanted for Solving a problem that a knife solved centuries ago.

A plastic tool that cuts one banana into perfect slices. It has a cult following thanks to its gloriously sarcastic online reviews, and it's cheap enough to give as a joke that also technically works.

Let it slide if You want a gift people will use more than once. Though they might.

Potty Putter Toilet Golf Game

Wanted for Making the bathroom a par-3.

A tiny putting green that wraps around the toilet, complete with a mini putter and a sign. It's a very stupid gift and a very reliable laugh, especially for the golfer who has everything.

Let it slide if The recipient has a shred of dignity they'd like to keep.

The Comfy Original Wearable Blanket

Wanted for Being a blanket with sleeves and showing no remorse.

A giant sherpa-lined hoodie that fits almost anyone, so you can skip the sizing guesswork. It looks ridiculous for about ten seconds, and then whoever's wearing it refuses to take it off.

Why it's here The most-stolen style of gift: funny at first, then everyone's quietly hoping to take it home.

Let it slide if They run hot and sleep with a fan on in December.

Dash Mini Waffle Maker

Wanted for Making tiny waffles that nobody needs but everybody wants.

A small, cheap waffle iron that comes in cheerful colors and takes up almost no room. It's perfect for dorm rooms and first apartments, and also for the person who finds it hilarious.

Let it slide if They've got no spare kitchen space at all.

SipCaddy Shower Drink Holder

Wanted for Enabling the shower beer on a professional level.

A suction-cup holder that keeps a can or a coffee within reach in the shower or bath. It's a funny idea that turns out to be quietly brilliant, and it makes a great low-cost gift.

Let it slide if They're strictly a quick-shower person.

Archie McPhee Finger Hands

Wanted for Giving your fingers tiny fingers of their own.

A set of little rubber hands that slip onto your fingertips. They're absurd, cheap, and funny in photos, which makes them perfect for stockings and Secret Santa on a strict budget.

Let it slide if You need a gift that says 'I respect you.'

Desktop Punching Bag

Wanted for Absorbing the blows meant for Gary in accounting.

A miniature punching bag that suctions onto a desk, with tiny gloves to match. It's office stress relief at its dumbest, and it's a great pick for a coworker exchange.

Let it slide if Their desk is shared or their coworkers are easily startled.

TRUFF Original Hot Sauce

Wanted for Putting truffle on things that didn't ask for it.

A black truffle hot sauce in a bottle that looks more like a cologne. It's an easy upgrade from everyday hot sauce, and it looks expensive enough to feel like a real present.

Let it slide if They think truffle tastes like gasoline. Some people do.

UNO Show 'em No Mercy

Wanted for Taking a harmless family game and removing all the safety rails.

A brutal version of UNO with extra-punishing cards like Draw 10. Everybody already knows the basics, so you can start playing right away and start resenting each other shortly after.

Let it slide if Someone in the family takes game night a little too personally.